


The History of Touch

by ML_is_me



Category: The X-Files
Genre: F/M, Romance, Vignette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-12-29
Updated: 2005-12-29
Packaged: 2019-04-28 04:16:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14441217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ML_is_me/pseuds/ML_is_me
Summary: Note from alice ttlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived atSpooky Awards, and was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2018. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address onSpookyAwards' collection profile.Author's notes:Not mine.  No profit being made.





	The History of Touch

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alice ttlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Spooky Awards](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Spooky_Awards), and was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2018. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address on [SpookyAwards' collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/spookyawards/profile).
> 
>  **Author's notes:** Not mine. No profit being made.

  
Author's notes: Not mine. No profit being made.   


* * *

The History of Touch, or   
A Five-Finger Love Affair  
by ML  
email: distribution: wherever fine fanfiction is read <g>. Please just let me know where.  
feedback: yes, please  
rating: all ages  
disclaimer: I don't own these characters, I'm only borrowing them for non-profit recreational use. 

For the BTT "Five-Finger Love Affair" challenge. 

* * *

Five-Finger Love Affair  
by ML 

My hand has been in love with Scully longer than I have. I know, that sounds vaguely off-color, but I can explain. 

The very first case we went on together, when we barely knew each other, Scully came to my motel room door in a fluster, demanding I examine the small of her back. I knelt down behind her and let my fingers drift over her soft skin, hardly daring to breathe. When I was able to reassure her that the bumps that had frightened her so were nothing serious, she whirled around and hugged me. Balancing a candle in one hand and an armful of grateful Scully, I barely knew what hit me. 

Score one for Agent Spooky. Not only a partnership, but a friendship was born that night. And, had I only known it, love was born then, too. I knew it in my fingertips, if nowhere else. It took my brain a much longer time to process that fact. 

My hand gravitated to the small of Scully's back of its own accord after that night. I didn't even think twice about it: whenever we walked together, my hand was there, just above her waist. Sometimes it just hovered, unsure of its reception; other times, it nestled happily, if lightly, against her jacket, guiding and being guided by her. 

Lucky hand. 

It's a good thing it took a while for my brain to catch up with my fingers, though. If I'd known how long it would be before I would experience more than a hand's caress, I don't think I'd have been able to stand it. 

That's not to say that there weren't a number of intimate moments, though they came at great cost to both of us. 

When I first realized what I was doing, I was afraid that Scully would interpret it as a sexist gesture, and let me know either by word or action that I should knock it off. But she never did. She even returned the favor on occasion. She saved her touches for the moments when they were most needed. As a result, just the touch of her fingers could ground me, bring me back to reality. A touch on my arm and a soft, "Mulder," was all it took most times. 

I can't count the number of times her touch has saved me. When I was in despair over losing the X-Files the first time, not to mention our partnership, her touch, just a ruffling of my hair, told me that no matter what, I still had her. Her fingers in mine at the close of the Modell/Pusher case meant more to me than I could trust myself to express in words. I contented myself with a brief return of the sympathetic pressure of her fingers on mine. 

In turn, I comforted Scully when I was allowed to, holding her close to me in the aftermath of too many terrible events. Like Donnie Pfaster, damn his soul. Not once, but twice. And when we learned of her cancer. I would gladly have lost all contact with her if I could have spared her the pain of those and many other encounters. 

There were low points in our partnership -- times when I thought I might lose the right to touch her at all -- we could barely communicate verbally, what chance did my touch have? The one non-verbal signal I seemed to get from Scully during one of those times was "back off." That trip to Philadelphia, that tattoo. The exact spot where she had the tattoo applied. At the time, she couldn't have done anything that could have hurt me more. Tell it to the hand. 

And yet, when I finally understood that it wasn't necessarily about me -- or my hand -- I couldn't stop thinking about it. Every time my hand hovered at her waist, I thought of the snake coiled there. It seemed to symbolize our lives at that time, and it got worse before it got better. But better it finally did get, both in my expectations and my hopes. Since then, I've tried to prove to her that things aren't as futile as they seemed. 

I think the jury's still out on that. But at least my brain -- and my heart -- have caught up with my hand. Although I still enjoy the clandestine public touching under the guise of gentlemanly behavior, I can now indulge in more than a five-finger love affair. Now I can love with all five _senses_ and it's beyond anything my feeble imagination could have conjured back in the day. 

Now I can say not just lucky hand, but lucky me. Lucky beats spooky any day of the week. Any day that includes touching Scully, at any rate. 

end. 

#### If you enjoyed this story, please feed the author.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Title: **The History of Touch**  
Author: ML  
Details: 4k  ·  R  ·  Standalone  ·  12/29/05  ·   Email/Website      
Gossamer Category(Keywords): Vignette   [Romance]     
Characters: Mulder, Scully     
Pairings: Mulder/Scully romance 


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